If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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