I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Randomize
