Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
