Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
