let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
