Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
