I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
