hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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