at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
