just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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