come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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