please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
