It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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