In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Randomize
