"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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