It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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