Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I don't deserve a penis
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Randomize