im having a threesome with these popsicles
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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