Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
grandma shit on top of the toilet
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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