Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Someone came in the potted fern
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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