i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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