Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
