I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
