With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
