dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
