just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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