Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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