I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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