What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Randomize
