Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
All the doctor said was why
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
