Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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