i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize