All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
