I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
