For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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