I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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