just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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