Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
