Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
No subtext here. People are naked.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
