he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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