Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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