Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
