your room smells of hookers.
And success
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize