my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
