I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
My penis needs a shock collar
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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