He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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