Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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