Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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