Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize