i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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